Degraded

I've been feeling degraded lately. As a Child, Wife, a Mother, a Colleague. When I was thinking about the past, while I was still in Secondary School. I felt the confidence, I felt like I am being ME. I do what I want to do, thinking that I know what I want. And I know I can fight back, with whoever trying to defeat me. But lately, that respect have gone. I felt weak, hopeless, and nothing but a wife and a mother. People have been labeling me as Lazy, Good for Nothing, Unappreciative. At times, I don't even know what to do, and all I do is stare at the ceiling where I once stared and have big dreams about my life. Well, now my life is all about impressing others. And when is not up to expectation, I felt like I fail BIG TIME. I remember when I was in secondary school. What people say is none of my business. Even though I know people wont be around me, to support me when I fail. But now, when you have trust, faith, belief with the people around you, this people simply goes against you when you fail. At most, they might even bring you down even deeper till you know no one will bring you back up anymore. And its dissapointing. And ME, Im stuck in that situation. When my confidence level is just about to went up, Im stuck as I was about to start, because there's no longer an opportunity for me to grow. I know, I am no longer the person I once used to be. The confidence is no longer there. Cause as i was about to raise myself up, people think its a joke and its impossible. Guess what? The person is no other than the people around me. I once so bubbly, confident with the decision that I chose. But now, something/someone is just stopping me.

Im in DILEMMA :(